Want more pleasure from your self-pleasuring?
Masturbation: pretty much everybody does it, yet hardly anyone ever talks about it!
And when was the last time you actually paid any real attention to how you get off – what you do, and why you do it?
Think about the last time you jerked off: be honest with yourself – how good was it?
Did you feel alive and connected afterwards? Or did the experience leave you feeling unfulfilled and unsatisfied? Did you feel like you were connecting with an important part of yourself, or was it a bit like scratching an itch?
There are very few other times in our lives when we consciously dedicate time for our own physical pleasure. Masturbation is the ideal opportunity to build a better relationship with yourself – so it would seem a shame not to maximise the potential!
What are the barriers to better masturbation?
There are some common issues which can get in the way when it comes to getting the most pleasure from solo sexy time:
I know what I like and I like what I know. Patterns and habits can seem comfortable but they can also often mask deeper issues or fears around intimacy or sexual expression
Getting the job done. If your masturbation is focused on reaching ejaculation or orgasm as quickly and silently as possible it means you may never get to explore what your body really enjoys (as opposed to what you think you ‘ought’ to enjoy)
Porn and fantasy. These can seem like easy shortcuts to arousal, and there’s nothing wrong with them, but they tend to take you into your head instead of staying in your body (which is where the real pleasure is felt)
How to make your experience of self-pleasure more mindful
Mindful masturbation is a process of bringing more awareness and care to how you self-pleasure. The best place to start is by learning about, and exploring, the 5 foundations of pleasure:
Breath
Movement
Sound
Touch
Attention
These 5 elements are the key to creating a deeper and more connected experience of physical pleasure.
And when you start to build a more conscious self-pleasure practice using these foundations you can shift not only into a new relationship with yourself, but also with your erotic partners. Mindful masturbation can literally be life-changing!
Even if you think you know your body inside out, there’s always something new to discover about it.